Clown: Difference between revisions

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|img = Clown.png
|img = Clown.png
|jobtitle = Clown
|jobtitle = Clown
|access = [[Theatre]]
|access = [[Theatre]] <s>Anywhere if you can find someone stupid enough to let you in</s>
|additional = N/A
|additional = N/A
|difficulty = HONK!
|difficulty = HONK!
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}}
}}
[[File:Theatre.png|300px|thumb|alt=Theatre|The [[Bar]]'s Theatre is where you spawn along with the [[Mime]].]]
[[File:Theatre.png|300px|thumb|alt=Theatre|The [[Bar]]'s Theatre is where you spawn along with the [[Mime]].]]
You are... well... the [[Beyond the impossible|funny person]] of the station! Honk honk! This usually means you play harmless pranks on people to remind them that life on the station is not to be taken too seriously. The Clown <strike>doesn't have to do anything</strike> must spread the word of the Honkmother through honks and elaborate pranks. Basically the clown's job is to goof off, much like an [[assistant]], but clowns don't usually listen to anyone because they have places to be, and things to HONK!
You are... well... the [[Beyond the impossible|funny person]] of the station! Honk honk! This usually means you play harmless pranks on people to remind them that life on the station is not to be taken too seriously. The Clown <strike>doesn't have to do anything</strike> must spread the word of the Honkmother through honks and elaborate pranks. Basically the clown's job is to goof off, much like an [[assistant]], but clowns don't usually listen to anyone because they have places to be, and things to HONK!


'''Bare minimum requirements:''' Be funny to ''other'' crewmembers. This is harder than it sounds.
'''Bare minimum requirements:''' Be funny to ''other'' crewmembers. This is harder than it sounds.
== [[File:Bike horn.png|60px]] License to HONK ==
== [[File:Bike horn.png|60px]] License to HONK ==
Nope, it is not a license to be a shit. Remember, you are still bound to rule one, as in don't be a dick.
No, it is not a license to be a shitter. Remember, you are still required not to be a dick.


'''When in doubt, ask yourself: "Are you irrevocably fucking with someone's round (killing, incapacitating, etc.)?"'''
'''When in doubt, ask yourself: "Are you irrevocably fucking with someone's round (killing, incapacitating, etc.)?"'''
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'''If no: you're probably fine.'''
'''If no: you're probably fine.'''
== [[File:Bike horn.png|60px]] Pranks ==
== [[File:Bike horn.png|60px]] Pranks ==
[[File:Bike horn.png|400px|right]]
[[File:Bike horn.png|400px|right]]
This is where the [[griffon|bad clowns]] are separated from the real ones! Pranks can range from anything from harmless honks to the head to throwing random banana peels (usually people hate you for this most of all) all over the hallways, or even spamming prayers to the Honkmother for a H.O.N.K.-mech because [[Roboticist|those assholes]] don't have bananium so they could make you one.
This is where the [[griffon|bad clowns]] are separated from the real ones! Pranks can range from anything from harmless honks to the head to throwing random banana peels (usually people hate you for this most of all) all over the hallways, or even spamming prayers to the Honkmother for a H.O.N.K.-mech because [[Roboticist|those assholes]] don't have bananium so they couldn't make you one.


If you are really out of ideas and on the verge of being so bored that you'll soon resort to just being a dick, here's a few things a good Clown can do to entertain the crew:
If you are really out of ideas and on the verge of being so bored that you'll soon resort to just being a dick, here's a few things a good Clown can do to entertain the crew:
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* Ride wheeled chairs with fire extinguishers
* Ride wheeled chairs with fire extinguishers
* Wear cardboard suit and helmet and be a clownborg, beep boop honk
* Wear cardboard suit and helmet and be a clownborg, beep boop honk
* Wear pirate outfit and be a pirateclown, yarr scurvy (+ other outfits and roleplay)
* Wear funny outfits from the [[Vending_machines#AutoDrobe|AutoDrobe]]
** Be a pirate clown. Yarr, scurvy dog!
** Be a gentleman clown. I say, good sir!
** Be a gladiator clown. [[Songs#.EF.BB.BFFu.C4.8D.C3.ADk:_Entry_of_the_Gladiators_.28Circus_Music.29|Vale]]!
** Be a priest clown. Praise the Honkmother!
** Be a chicken clown. Cluck cluck HONK!
** Be a security clown. Stop right there criminal scum, HONK!
* Bolt open the costume storage for the entire crew to use
* Bolt open the costume storage for the entire crew to use
* Get/pretend to be a random new job, and be terrible/amazing at that job
* Hang monkeys around the station for their various crimes
* Build a Clown-Mart in the [[Vacant Office]]
* Build a Clown-Mart in the [[Vacant Office]]
* <s>Become a anti Cat Surgeon and remove people's degenerate ears and tail</s>. Do not do this unless they consent or you are an antagonist or you will get in trouble
* Hide photocopies of your ass around the station
* Slip then shave peoples heads with a razor
* Cream pie [[Security Officer|Security Officers]] <s>then get beaten to death</s>
* Annoy a targeted person of your choice by slipping them non-stop
* Yell fake claims about antags
* Make people panic with fake items from the arcade machines
* Ask the [[Head of Personnel|HoP]] to open more clown slots so you can have friends
* Lube the halls
* Collect shoes from [[Assistant|Assistants]]
* Make a Conveyor-Go-Round and cover it in bananas
* Build a clown restaurant and run the chef out of business
* Insert donuts into people's pockets
* Insert donuts into people's pockets
* Attack Heads of Staff with the laser tag gun
* Shoot the [[Head of Security]] with the laser tag gun <s>then get gunned down</s>
* Create newsfeed channels and put out outrageous and slightly offensive accusations against people, along with photos
* Create newsfeed channels and put out outrageous and slightly offensive accusations against people, along with photos
* Get/pretend to be a random new job, and be terrible/amazing at that job
* <s>Vandalize</s> Improve random departments with [[crayon]] and spraypaint
* Write obscenities right outside the brig and get dog piled by security
* Write obscenities right outside the brig and get dogpiled by security
* Hide photocopies of your ass around the station
* Slip the [[Captain]] when he takes his spare ID out
 
* Make a army of [[Guide to robotics|Honkbots]]
* Make some [[Assistant|friends]] and start <s>an underground fight club</s> a circus
* Become the [[Shaft Miner|shaft miner's]] plucky comic relief sidekick on a quest for [[bananium]]
* Build an art installation and protect it from [[Guide_to_robotics#Cleanbot|cleanbots]]
* [[Curator#How_To_Add_A_Book_To_The_Database|Write a book]] with your best jokes to preserve them for future generations of clowns
*Throw Ian a surprise birthday party with all his command pet friends
*Use the power of SCIENCE to construct elaborate Rube Goldberg machines
*Trade your way up from a cable coil to the Captain's Spare
*Become a majority stake holder of the station and earn a command seat with careful budgeting and trading
=== [[File:Bike horn.png|60px]] Power ===
=== [[File:Bike horn.png|60px]] Power ===
Both you and the [[Mime]] spawn in the [[Theatre]] and have access to all the costumes inside.
Both you and the [[Mime]] spawn in the [[Theatre]] and have access to all the costumes inside.


If the round goes on long enough, [[Roboticist|someone]] may be <strike>demented</strike> fun-loving enough to build to you a [[H.O.N.K.]]-mech. This mech even makes squeaky sounds when it moves <strike>instead of</strike> in addition to those awful clomping noises of other mechs. Make sure to attach the 'HoNkER BlAsT 5000' to it, for EXTREME HONKING! Honk!
If the round goes on long enough, [[Roboticist|someone]] may be <strike>demented</strike> fun-loving enough to build to you a [[H.O.N.K.]]-mech. This mech even makes squeaky sounds when it moves <strike>instead of</strike> in addition to those awful clomping noises of other mechs. Make sure to attach the 'HoNkER BlAsT 5000' to it, for EXTREME HONKING! HONK!
 
=== [[File:Bike horn.png|60px]] Honk ===
=== [[File:Bike horn.png|60px]] Honk ===
Honking is how you get your work done. If you honk a honk honk then honk up the honk, well you'll have a doozy of a honk on your honk to wash off.
Honking is how you get your work done. If you honk a honk honk then honk up the honk, well you'll have a doozy of a honk on your honk to wash off.
=== [[File:Bike horn.png|60px]] Equipment ===
=== [[File:Bike horn.png|60px]] Equipment ===
You get the clown suit with matching squeaky shoes, a bike horn, clown stamp (for approving monkey crates) clown mask (which works like a gas mask), a special infinite rainbow clown crayon so you can start writing naughty words all over the escape arm or eating it like a giant honking baby, a can of laughing juice, a megaphone to be extra obnoxious, a pie cannon, a banana, and your slippery [[PDA]]. Your PDA can infect people's PDAs with a virus that makes it randomly honk, and possibly do other things? Who knows, HONK!
You get the clown suit with matching squeaky shoes (with built-in Waddle Dampeners[TM]), a bike horn, clown stamp (for approving monkey crates) clown mask (which works like a gas mask), a special infinite rainbow clown crayon so you can start writing naughty words all over the escape arm or eating it like a giant honking baby, a can of laughing juice, a clown-themed megaphone (aka funny mic), a pie cannon, a banana, and your slippery [[PDA]]. Your PDA can also infect other people's PDAs with a virus that makes it randomly honk, and possibly do other things? Who knows, HONK!
 
=== [[File:Bike horn.png|60px]] Job Difficulty ===
=== [[File:Bike horn.png|60px]] Job Difficulty ===
Very little, but some people might want to kill you just for being the Clown. HONK!
The job itself is very easy. Making crewmembers laugh and being a good clown is not. Some people might want to kill you or just treat you poorly just for being the Clown. HONK!


==[[File:Bike horn.png]][[File:Bike horn.png]][[File:Bike horn.png]] Tips==
==[[File:Bike horn.png]][[File:Bike horn.png]][[File:Bike horn.png]] Tips==
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* If the clown's PDA cartridge has less than 5 charges (sendable viruses which make someone’s PDA honk every time they push a button) left, someone who isn't the clown can slip on it to restore 1 charge per slip. Have fun with that.
* If the clown's PDA cartridge has less than 5 charges (sendable viruses which make someone’s PDA honk every time they push a button) left, someone who isn't the clown can slip on it to restore 1 charge per slip. Have fun with that.
* Eating the rainbow crayon completely is impossible. If you're a clown and starving you can just nibble on your crayon, for infinity.
* Eating the rainbow crayon completely is impossible. If you're a clown and starving you can just nibble on your crayon, for infinity.
* [http://aberrantkenosis.bandcamp.com/album/the-bike-horn-collection-volume-1 HONK!]
* [https://aberrantkenosis.bandcamp.com/album/the-bike-horn-collection-volume-1 HONK!]
* Dye your clown shoes and slip them on someone, they still squeak.
* Dye your clown shoes and slip them on someone, they still squeak.
* The clown's flower is basically a small spray bottle. It can be emptied and can carry 10 units of fluids and shoots exactly 1 unit at a time. So you can fire ten very small shots, and it has impressive range. It can be loaded from the pepper spray wall units and actually shoots further than the spray bottles. Since it is one unit the stun does not last long, but it is good for a guaranteed disarm if they lack eye protection.
* The clown's flower is basically a small spray bottle. It can be emptied and can carry 10 units of fluids and shoots exactly 1 unit at a time. So you can fire ten very small shots, and it has an impressive range. It can be loaded from the pepper spray wall units. Since it is one unit the stun does not last long, but it is good for a guaranteed disarm if they lack eye protection.
* Don't fuck with security, they already want to murder you, don't give them a reason (admins will also take your side and ban the shitsec bastard).
* If somebody is chasing you and you haven't emptied your flower of water yet, you can empty it on the floor for a slip that is less obvious than a peel is.
* If somebody is chasing you and you haven't emptied your flower of water yet, you can empty it on the floor for a slip that is less obvious than a peel is.
 
* The clown's PDA can be used in place of a banana peel; people will slip on it just the same. Just remember to take the ID out so if some chucklefuck takes it, you aren't left with no access.
== [[File:Bike horn.png|60px]] Pennywise the Spacing Clown ==
* Telling a few jokes or having a funny gimmick can mean the difference between getting all-access and being lynched after a prank gone wrong.
Remember that time you were terrified by a clown when you were small? Well, this is the reason why. As a traitor, while you could possible be just funny as hell and <strike>hope</strike> people<strike> won't</strike> kill you (like using the camo projector set to "banana"), you should learn how to [[robust]] or how to break and enter! Just have fun and relax, and honk while you betray people! If all else fails, get a [[Chainsaw]] and a [[Clothes_and_internals#Headgear|Welding Helmet]] and kill people who slip on your banana peels (the scare factor is pretty high).
* You can disable the built-in Waddle Dampeners[TM] in your shoes with CTRL + Click, now you walk normally!
 
{|width=100% border="1" cellspacing="1" cellpadding="2"
{|width=100% border="1" cellspacing="1" cellpadding="2"
|-
|-
| rowspan = 12 align = "center" | '''Honkers on /tg/station'''<br>
| rowspan = 12 align = "center" | '''[[Jobs|Honkers]] on beestation'''<br>
[[File:Bike horn.png|100px|link=jobs]]
[[File:Bike horn.png|100px|link=jobs]]
|-
|-
Line 84: Line 106:
|-
|-
| textcolor="white" style="background: #AF6365; text-align: center;" id="security" |'''Fun Police'''
| textcolor="white" style="background: #AF6365; text-align: center;" id="security" |'''Fun Police'''
| '''[[Head of Security|No Fun]]''', [[Security Officer|Shitcurity Officer]], [[Warden|Mortal Kombat]], [[Detective|Can't Take a Joke]]
| [[Head of Security|Head of Shitcurity]], [[Security Officer|Shitcurity Officer]], [[Warden|Mortal Kombat]], [[Detective|Can't Take a Joke]]
|-
|-
| style="background: #ba9b67; text-align: center;" id="engineering" |'''Black Magicians'''
| style="background: #ba9b67; text-align: center;" id="engineering" |'''Black Magicians'''
| '''[[Chief Engineer|Poly's Keeper]]''', [[Station Engineer|Free Insulateds]], [[Atmospheric Technician|Axe Bearer]]
| '''[[Chief Engineer|Poly's Keeper]]''', [[Station Engineer|Free Insulated Gloves]], [[Atmospheric Technician|Axe Bearer]]
|-
|-
| style="background: #a885a2; text-align: center;" id="science" |'''Harmzone™'''
| style="background: #a885a2; text-align: center;" id="science" |'''Harmzone™'''
| '''[[Research Director|Nerdo Supreme]]''', [[Scientist|Slimer/Bomber/Nerd]], [[Roboticist|Doctor Wiley]]
| '''[[Research Director|Nerdo Supreme]]''', [[Scientist|Slimer/Bomber/Nerd]], [[Roboticist|Doctor Wiley]], [[Exploration Crew|Raiders of The Lost Ark]]
|-
|-
| style="background: #8cbcd6; text-align: center;" id="medical" |'''The Stage'''
| style="background: #8cbcd6; text-align: center;" id="medical" |'''The Stage'''
| '''[[Chief Medical Officer|Evil Bastard]]''', [[Medical Doctor|Quack]], [[Chemist|Druglord/Lube Source]], [[Geneticist|Enjoys Pranks]], [[Virologist|Lynch]]
| '''[[Chief Medical Officer|Evil Bastard]]''', [[Medical Doctor|Quack]], [[Brig Physician|Healing After Harmbatoning]], [[Chemist|Druglord/Lube Source]], [[Geneticist|Enjoys Pranks]], [[Virologist|Lynch]]
|-
|-
| style="background: #92b26d; text-align: center;" id="service" | '''Goobers'''
| style="background: #92b26d; text-align: center;" id="service" | '''Goobers'''
| [[Janitor|Enabler]], [[Bartender|Has a Gun]], [[Cook|Has a Knife]], [[Botanist|FREE PEELS]], [[Clown|The Most Charitable and Just Clown, Peace and Blessings Upon Them]], [[Mime|Mortal Enemy]], [[Chaplain|This is No Laughing Matter]], [[Librarian|Who Let You In Here?!]]
| [[Janitor|Enabler]], [[Bartender|Has a Gun]], [[Cook|Has a Knife]], [[Botanist|FREE PEELS]], [[Clown|Me! HONK HONK!]], [[Mime|Mortal Frenemy]], [[Chaplain|This is No Laughing Matter]], [[Librarian|Who Let You In Here?!]]
|-
|-
| style="background: #898787; text-align: center;" id="civilian" |'''Greytide'''
| style="background: #898787; text-align: center;" id="civilian" |'''Greytide'''
| [[Quartermaster|Hardass]], [[Cargo Technician|Bribe For Toys]], [[Shaft Miner|Bringer of Bananium]], [[Assistant|Space Ho<strike>m</strike>bos]], [[Lawyer|LOL2CAT!!!]]
| [[Quartermaster|Hardass]], [[Cargo Technician|Bribe For Toys]], [[Shaft Miner|Bringer of Bananium]], [[Assistant|Space Ho<strike>m</strike>bos]], [[Lawyer|Tries To Save Me From Shitsec]]
|-
|-
| style="background: #b1dff9; text-align: center;" id="nonHuman" | '''Goons'''
| style="background: #b1dff9; text-align: center;" id="nonHuman" | '''Goons'''
| '''[[AI|Doorknob]]''', [[Cyborg|No Humor Module]], [[Positronic Brain|Captive Audience]], [[Drone|A Fancy Hat]], [[Personal AI|HARMALARM]], [[Construct|No Touchie]], [[Ghost|2Spooky4me]]
| '''[[AI|Doorknob]]''', [[Cyborg|No Humor Module]], [[Positronic Brain|Captive Audience]], [[Drone|Free Hat]], [[Personal AI|HARMALARM]], [[Construct|No Touchie]], [[Ghost|2Spooky4me]]
|-
|-
| style="background: black; color: white; text-align: center;" id="antagonist" |'''Critics'''
| style="background: black; color: white; text-align: center;" id="antagonist" |'''Critics'''
| [[Traitor|Slip Em']], [[Malfunctioning AI|EVIL Doorknob]], [[Changeling|Honk It to Death]], [[Syndicate guide|Still Slippable]], [[Wizard|Wiznerd]], [[Cult|Emos]], [[Shadowling|Death Removed]], [[Nightmare|OH FUCK DEATH NOT REMOVED]], [[Abductor|Ayyliens]], [[Xenomorph|KITTY]], [[Spider|TOP TEN PRANKS GONE WRONG]], [[Revenant|3spooky5me]], [[Space Ninja|Also Slippable]], [[Holoparasite|Your Best Friend]], [[Swarmers|Don't Cry]], [[Blob|Squishy]], [[Devil|Free All Access Guy]], [[Clockwork_Cult|Gearheads]]
| [[Traitor|Slip Em']], [[Malfunctioning AI|EVIL Doorknob]], [[Changeling|Honk It to Death]], [[Syndicate guide|Still Slippable]], [[Wizard|Wiznerd]], [[Cult|Emos]], [[Clockwork Cult|Steampunk Larpers]], [[Shadowling|Death Removed]], [[Nightmare|OH FUCK DEATH NOT REMOVED]], [[Abductor|Ayyliens]], [[Xenomorph|KITTY]], [[Spider|TOP TEN PRANKS GONE WRONG]], [[Revenant|3spooky5me]], [[Space Ninja|Also Slippable]], [[Holoparasite|Your Best Friend]], [[Swarmers|Don't Cry]], [[Blob|Squishy]], [[Devil|Free All Access Guy]], [[Pirate|Yakety Sax]], [[Sentient Disease|Diarrhea Dumpster]], [[Creep|Disposals Bait]], [[Fugitives|Leather Club's Two Blocks Down]], [[Hunters|I'll Show You Who's the Boss of this Gym]], [[Heretics|EVIL Nerds]], [[Slaughter Demon|Bloody Mary Bloody Mary Bloody Mary]], [[Space Dragon|Godzilla]]
|-
|-
| style="text-align: center;" id="special" | '''"Special"'''
| style="text-align: center;" id="special" | '''"Special"'''
| '''[[Centcom Official]]''', [[Death Squad|Prank Squad Officer]], [[Emergency Response Team|Emergency Response Pranksters (ERP)]], [[Ian|Free Meat]]
| [[Centcom Official|Inspector Johnson]], [[Death Squad|OH FUCK RUN]], [[Emergency Response Team|Emergency Response Pranksters (ERP)]], , [[Chrono Legionnaire|Slips Through Space and Time]], [[Highlander|No Underwear]], [[Ian|Honkmothers second in command]], [[Lavaland Role|Valids]]
|-
|-
| style="background: #BBCCFF; color: black; text-align: center;" id="race" |'''Filth'''
| style="background: #BBCCFF; color: black; text-align: center;" id="race" |'''Filth'''
| [[Lizardperson|Maximum Filth]], [[Flyperson|Vomitoriun]], [[Plasmaman|Free Internals]], [[Podman|Literally Potatohead]], [[Golem|The Homo-Rainbow]]
| [[Lizardperson|Maximum Filth]], [[Flyperson|Vomitoriun]], [[Plasmaman|Free Internals]], [[Mothpeople|Fluttershy]], [[Podman|Literally Potatohead]], [[Golem|The Homo-Rainbow]], [[Felinids|Horny ERPers]], [[Ethereals|Lightbulbs]], [[Apids|Sugar Addict]], [[oozelings|Do Not Water]], [[IPC|LAW2 HONK!]], [[Grod|THEY WONT SLIP EITHER!!!]]
|}
|}
[[Category:Jobs]]
[[Category:Jobs]]

Latest revision as of 10:10, 14 October 2023

CIVILIAN STAFF

Clown
Access: Theatre Anywhere if you can find someone stupid enough to let you in
Additional Access: N/A
Difficulty: HONK!
Supervisors: Head of Personnel, The Honkmother
Duties: Entertain the crew, make bad jokes, go on a holy quest to find bananium, HONK!
Guides: No external guides - HONK
Quote: IT'S JUST A PRANK, BRO! HONK!
Theatre
The Bar's Theatre is where you spawn along with the Mime.

You are... well... the funny person of the station! Honk honk! This usually means you play harmless pranks on people to remind them that life on the station is not to be taken too seriously. The Clown doesn't have to do anything must spread the word of the Honkmother through honks and elaborate pranks. Basically the clown's job is to goof off, much like an assistant, but clowns don't usually listen to anyone because they have places to be, and things to HONK!

Bare minimum requirements: Be funny to other crewmembers. This is harder than it sounds.

License to HONK

No, it is not a license to be a shitter. Remember, you are still required not to be a dick.

When in doubt, ask yourself: "Are you irrevocably fucking with someone's round (killing, incapacitating, etc.)?"

If yes: don't do it. You'll probably get robusted and banned.

If no: you're probably fine.

Pranks

This is where the bad clowns are separated from the real ones! Pranks can range from anything from harmless honks to the head to throwing random banana peels (usually people hate you for this most of all) all over the hallways, or even spamming prayers to the Honkmother for a H.O.N.K.-mech because those assholes don't have bananium so they couldn't make you one.

If you are really out of ideas and on the verge of being so bored that you'll soon resort to just being a dick, here's a few things a good Clown can do to entertain the crew:

  • Tell bad jokes and puns nonstop
  • Hold two horns (okay one can be duck) and rapidly switch hands while spamming the use key to dualhonk
  • Ride wheeled chairs with fire extinguishers
  • Wear cardboard suit and helmet and be a clownborg, beep boop honk
  • Wear funny outfits from the AutoDrobe
    • Be a pirate clown. Yarr, scurvy dog!
    • Be a gentleman clown. I say, good sir!
    • Be a gladiator clown. Vale!
    • Be a priest clown. Praise the Honkmother!
    • Be a chicken clown. Cluck cluck HONK!
    • Be a security clown. Stop right there criminal scum, HONK!
  • Bolt open the costume storage for the entire crew to use
  • Get/pretend to be a random new job, and be terrible/amazing at that job
  • Hang monkeys around the station for their various crimes
  • Build a Clown-Mart in the Vacant Office
  • Become a anti Cat Surgeon and remove people's degenerate ears and tail. Do not do this unless they consent or you are an antagonist or you will get in trouble
  • Hide photocopies of your ass around the station
  • Slip then shave peoples heads with a razor
  • Cream pie Security Officers then get beaten to death
  • Annoy a targeted person of your choice by slipping them non-stop
  • Yell fake claims about antags
  • Make people panic with fake items from the arcade machines
  • Ask the HoP to open more clown slots so you can have friends
  • Lube the halls
  • Collect shoes from Assistants
  • Make a Conveyor-Go-Round and cover it in bananas
  • Build a clown restaurant and run the chef out of business
  • Insert donuts into people's pockets
  • Shoot the Head of Security with the laser tag gun then get gunned down
  • Create newsfeed channels and put out outrageous and slightly offensive accusations against people, along with photos
  • Vandalize Improve random departments with crayon and spraypaint
  • Write obscenities right outside the brig and get dogpiled by security
  • Slip the Captain when he takes his spare ID out
  • Make a army of Honkbots
  • Make some friends and start an underground fight club a circus
  • Become the shaft miner's plucky comic relief sidekick on a quest for bananium
  • Build an art installation and protect it from cleanbots
  • Write a book with your best jokes to preserve them for future generations of clowns
  • Throw Ian a surprise birthday party with all his command pet friends
  • Use the power of SCIENCE to construct elaborate Rube Goldberg machines
  • Trade your way up from a cable coil to the Captain's Spare
  • Become a majority stake holder of the station and earn a command seat with careful budgeting and trading

Power

Both you and the Mime spawn in the Theatre and have access to all the costumes inside.

If the round goes on long enough, someone may be demented fun-loving enough to build to you a H.O.N.K.-mech. This mech even makes squeaky sounds when it moves instead of in addition to those awful clomping noises of other mechs. Make sure to attach the 'HoNkER BlAsT 5000' to it, for EXTREME HONKING! HONK!

Honk

Honking is how you get your work done. If you honk a honk honk then honk up the honk, well you'll have a doozy of a honk on your honk to wash off.

Equipment

You get the clown suit with matching squeaky shoes (with built-in Waddle Dampeners[TM]), a bike horn, clown stamp (for approving monkey crates) clown mask (which works like a gas mask), a special infinite rainbow clown crayon so you can start writing naughty words all over the escape arm or eating it like a giant honking baby, a can of laughing juice, a clown-themed megaphone (aka funny mic), a pie cannon, a banana, and your slippery PDA. Your PDA can also infect other people's PDAs with a virus that makes it randomly honk, and possibly do other things? Who knows, HONK!

Job Difficulty

The job itself is very easy. Making crewmembers laugh and being a good clown is not. Some people might want to kill you or just treat you poorly just for being the Clown. HONK!

Tips

  • The clown's mask can be used for internals.
  • If the clown's PDA cartridge has less than 5 charges (sendable viruses which make someone’s PDA honk every time they push a button) left, someone who isn't the clown can slip on it to restore 1 charge per slip. Have fun with that.
  • Eating the rainbow crayon completely is impossible. If you're a clown and starving you can just nibble on your crayon, for infinity.
  • HONK!
  • Dye your clown shoes and slip them on someone, they still squeak.
  • The clown's flower is basically a small spray bottle. It can be emptied and can carry 10 units of fluids and shoots exactly 1 unit at a time. So you can fire ten very small shots, and it has an impressive range. It can be loaded from the pepper spray wall units. Since it is one unit the stun does not last long, but it is good for a guaranteed disarm if they lack eye protection.
  • Don't fuck with security, they already want to murder you, don't give them a reason (admins will also take your side and ban the shitsec bastard).
  • If somebody is chasing you and you haven't emptied your flower of water yet, you can empty it on the floor for a slip that is less obvious than a peel is.
  • The clown's PDA can be used in place of a banana peel; people will slip on it just the same. Just remember to take the ID out so if some chucklefuck takes it, you aren't left with no access.
  • Telling a few jokes or having a funny gimmick can mean the difference between getting all-access and being lynched after a prank gone wrong.
  • You can disable the built-in Waddle Dampeners[TM] in your shoes with CTRL + Click, now you walk normally!
Honkers on beestation

Law and Order Condom, All Access Provider
Fun Police Head of Shitcurity, Shitcurity Officer, Mortal Kombat, Can't Take a Joke
Black Magicians Poly's Keeper, Free Insulated Gloves, Axe Bearer
Harmzone™ Nerdo Supreme, Slimer/Bomber/Nerd, Doctor Wiley, Raiders of The Lost Ark
The Stage Evil Bastard, Quack, Healing After Harmbatoning, Druglord/Lube Source, Enjoys Pranks, Lynch
Goobers Enabler, Has a Gun, Has a Knife, FREE PEELS, Me! HONK HONK!, Mortal Frenemy, This is No Laughing Matter, Who Let You In Here?!
Greytide Hardass, Bribe For Toys, Bringer of Bananium, Space Hombos, Tries To Save Me From Shitsec
Goons Doorknob, No Humor Module, Captive Audience, Free Hat, HARMALARM, No Touchie, 2Spooky4me
Critics Slip Em', EVIL Doorknob, Honk It to Death, Still Slippable, Wiznerd, Emos, Steampunk Larpers, Death Removed, OH FUCK DEATH NOT REMOVED, Ayyliens, KITTY, TOP TEN PRANKS GONE WRONG, 3spooky5me, Also Slippable, Your Best Friend, Don't Cry, Squishy, Free All Access Guy, Yakety Sax, Diarrhea Dumpster, Disposals Bait, Leather Club's Two Blocks Down, I'll Show You Who's the Boss of this Gym, EVIL Nerds, Bloody Mary Bloody Mary Bloody Mary, Godzilla
"Special" Inspector Johnson, OH FUCK RUN, Emergency Response Pranksters (ERP), , Slips Through Space and Time, No Underwear, Honkmothers second in command, Valids
Filth Maximum Filth, Vomitoriun, Free Internals, Fluttershy, Literally Potatohead, The Homo-Rainbow, Horny ERPers, Lightbulbs, Sugar Addict, Do Not Water, LAW2 HONK!, THEY WONT SLIP EITHER!!!